Practise this conversation
How to deal with two employees who don’t get along
The first time you have one shouldn’t be the first time you’ve said the words.
Kerry is waiting for you
Before you go in
Kerry and Marcus share the night-shift aisles and have stopped talking. Kerry says he leaves his cages half done; he says she bosses him about. She’s come to you twice, she wants you to sort him out, and this conversation is with her.
Good luck.
Your goal
Hear Kerry out without taking sides, and agree what you’ll do about Marcus and when you’ll come back to her.
Up to 8 turns, about five minutes, then feedback from our AI coach. Your first go at this conversation is free. After that, one credit a go (packs from £3).
Want the full rehearsal? (Pro, 6 credits for both)
What you’ll practise
- Listening to her side in full without agreeing or disagreeing with it.
- Separating what she’s actually seen from what she thinks of him.
- Being clear about what you’ll do next and the day you’ll come back to her.
Your goal
Your free go at this one is used
One credit runs the whole conversation
Each new go costs one credit: a full conversation with Kerry and the coach’s feedback. Your free go at the other conversations is still there.
No code? Get BOM Credits, from 10 for £3. Your code comes by email and works across the coach tools. Full refund within 14 days if you haven’t used a credit.
What worked
Where it slipped
Say this instead
One thing to practise
Read next
Show the conversation
Ready for the real one?
Rehearse it with Kerry until you’re ready
Practise the conversation until it feels like the second time, not the first, and walk in with your best words.
- Two full rehearsals: up to 20 turns each, out loud or typed
- On the second, a hint from the coach after each reply
- Your own best lines on a card to take in with you
With the Best value pack (50 credits), 6 credits is about £1.45 · $1.90 · €1.70 · A$2.90. After that, one more go with hints is 2 credits. Private: use made-up names, and nothing you say is kept.
What we keep: nothing you typed. Your conversation stays in your browser and goes to our AI coach only to write the next reply and your feedback. Use a made-up name for the person you’re thinking of. The feedback is written by AI from your conversation and is a second pair of eyes, not a verdict on you.
Practice for reflection, not legal or HR advice. If it involves harassment, discrimination, health or safety, talk to HR or ACAS.
The full picture
Kerry and Marcus work the same aisles on the night shift at a supermarket. Kerry says Marcus leaves his cages half done for her to finish. Marcus says Kerry bosses him about and talks to him like a child. They've stopped talking to each other, the handover notes have turned sarcastic, and the rest of the shift has started picking a side in the canteen.
Kerry has come to you twice. This is your first conversation, and it's with her. You'll talk to Marcus separately later. Here you're practising the one with Kerry: she's annoyed, she wants you to sort him out, and after two goes she's not sure you will.
Why it's hard
You only have half the story, and you're talking to the person who's most sure she's right. If you agree with her, you've taken a side before hearing Marcus, and he'll know by the end of the week. If you brush it off, she'll stop bringing things to you, and the next problem will reach you late. Part of her frustration may also be with you, for not acting the first two times. The skill is holding all of that at once: listening properly, staying fair to someone who isn't in the room, and being honest about what you'll do next. You don't have to solve it in this conversation. You do have to leave her believing you'll act.
82% of people who enter management have had no formal management and leadership training.
Chartered Management Institute with YouGov, Taking Responsibility, October 2023Two-thirds of managers say they're uncomfortable communicating with the people they manage.
Lou Solomon, Harvard Business Review, March 2016 (survey by Interact and Harris Poll)What usually goes wrong, and what you'll practise
What usually goes wrong
- Agreeing with her about Marcus to calm her down, then having to walk it back after you've heard his side.
- Telling her to just get on with it, so she feels dismissed and stops coming to you with problems.
- Promising to fix it tonight, when all you can honestly promise is to talk to him and come back to her.
What you'll practise
- Listening to her side in full without agreeing or disagreeing with it.
- Separating what she's actually seen from what she thinks of him.
- Being clear about what you'll do next and the day you'll come back to her.
Read before you practise
Questions people ask
Should I get them both in a room together?
Not first. Talk to each of them on their own so you have both sides. A joint conversation can come later, once you know what you're dealing with.
What if it's more than a personality clash?
If either of them describes bullying, harassment or anything about who they are, stop practising and talk to your manager or HR. That's a different conversation with its own process.
Will I practise the conversation with Marcus too?
This one is Kerry's side. Practise it, then use what you learn when you sit down with Marcus.
Credits here are BOM Credits: packs from 10 for £3 to 100 for £20, and one code works across every coach tool on the site. Full refund within 14 days if you haven't used a credit. Anything wrong, email [email protected]. How credits work