Practise this conversation
How to get an employee to open up in one-to-ones
Practise the review before the review.
Lee is waiting for you
Before you go in
Lee is one of two night team leaders, and his one-to-ones last three minutes: fine, all good. Since the other team leader left he’s been running both teams, working fifty-hour weeks, and errors are creeping up. You’ve booked a proper half hour at the end of his shift.
Good luck.
Your goal
Get past all good and find out what running both teams is costing Lee, then agree one practical thing to ease it.
Up to 8 turns, about five minutes, then feedback from our AI coach. Your first go at this conversation is free. After that, one credit a go (packs from £3).
Want the full rehearsal? (Pro, 6 credits for both)
What you’ll practise
- Naming what you’ve noticed, his hours and how he seems, without blame.
- Asking open questions and leaving a silence long enough for him to answer.
- Hearing the whole story before agreeing one practical thing that helps.
Your goal
Your free go at this one is used
One credit runs the whole conversation
Each new go costs one credit: a full conversation with Lee and the coach’s feedback. Your free go at the other conversations is still there.
No code? Get BOM Credits, from 10 for £3. Your code comes by email and works across the coach tools. Full refund within 14 days if you haven’t used a credit.
What worked
Where it slipped
Say this instead
One thing to practise
Read next
Show the conversation
Ready for the real one?
Rehearse it with Lee until you’re ready
Practise the conversation until it feels like the second time, not the first, and walk in with your best words.
- Two full rehearsals: up to 20 turns each, out loud or typed
- On the second, a hint from the coach after each reply
- Your own best lines on a card to take in with you
With the Best value pack (50 credits), 6 credits is about £1.45 · $1.90 · €1.70 · A$2.90. After that, one more go with hints is 2 credits. Private: use made-up names, and nothing you say is kept.
What we keep: nothing you typed. Your conversation stays in your browser and goes to our AI coach only to write the next reply and your feedback. Use a made-up name for the person you’re thinking of. The feedback is written by AI from your conversation and is a second pair of eyes, not a verdict on you.
Practice for reflection, not legal or HR advice. If it involves harassment, discrimination, health or safety, talk to HR or ACAS.
The full picture
Lee is one of two night-shift team leaders at an online grocery warehouse. He's dependable, quiet and never causes you a problem. Your weekly one-to-ones with him last about three minutes: how's the shift, fine, anything you need, no, all good. Then he's gone.
But the numbers say something else. Since the other night team leader left in September, Lee has been running both teams. He's worked over fifty hours most weeks, picking errors on nights have crept up, and he looks tired. You've booked a proper half hour with him this week, at the end of his shift.
Why it's hard
"Fine" is a closed door, and it's easy to accept it, because it lets you both off. Push too hard and he'll feel interrogated and close up further. Jump straight to the picking errors and he'll hear criticism, which is exactly what he's been bracing for. The skill is naming what you've noticed without blame, asking a question that can't be answered with one word, and leaving a silence long enough for him to fill it. Then, when he does open up, not rushing to fix it before you've heard the whole thing.
42% of managers say they know what they want to say in a difficult conversation, but struggle with how to say it.
The Predictive Index, 2026 AI and People Leadership Survey (399 managers and 208 business leaders, July 2026)What usually goes wrong, and what you'll practise
What usually goes wrong
- Accepting "fine" and moving on, because the real answer feels like more work.
- Opening with the picking errors, so he hears criticism and defends himself.
- Rushing to offer a solution the moment he admits anything, so he stops talking.
What you'll practise
- Naming what you've noticed, his hours and how he seems, without blame.
- Asking open questions and leaving a silence long enough for him to answer.
- Hearing the whole story before agreeing one practical thing that helps.
Read before you practise
Questions people ask
What if they really are fine?
Then you've lost nothing. Saying what you've noticed and asking once more, properly, tells them the door is open. Some people need two or three of those before they walk through it.
What if it turns out to be something personal or a health problem?
Listen, don't diagnose, and don't promise what you can't arrange. If it's about health or something serious at home, point them to your HR team or employee support, and in the UK, ACAS has free advice.
Credits here are BOM Credits: packs from 10 for £3 to 100 for £20, and one code works across every coach tool on the site. Full refund within 14 days if you haven't used a credit. Anything wrong, email [email protected]. How credits work